Faffing Around

MerDer song #537

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 04:50:22 GMT

Can you tell me how we got in this situation,
I can’t seem to get you off my mind,
all these ups and downs,
they trip up our good intentions,
nobody said this was easy right?

After all we’re only human,
always fighting what we’re feeling,
hurt instead of healing,
after all we’re only human,
is there any other reason
why we stay instead of leavin’ after all

Can we get back to the point of this conversation,
when we saw things through each others eyes,
cause now all I see is ruin and devastation,
we all need some place we can hide inside, and

After all we’re only human,
always fighting what we’re feeling,
hurt instead of healing,
after all we’re only human,
is there any other reason
why we stay instead of leavin’

I’m smart enough to know,
that life goes by,
and it leaves a trail of broken hearts behind,
if you feel I’m letting go,
just give me time,
I’ll come running to your side,

Can you tell me how we got in this situation,
I can’t seem to get you off my mind cause

After all we’re only human,
always fighting what we’re feeling,
hurt instead of healing,
after all we’re only human,
is there any other reason
why we stay instead of leavin’

After all we’re only human,
always fighting what we’re feeling,
hurt instead of healing,
After all we’re only human,
is there any other reason
why we stay instead of leavin’ after all

Any other reason
to stay instead of leavin’
after all, yeah

-Human by Jon McLaughlin

Yeah I so rock out to that in the car...I am awesome.

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 01:35:29 GMT

3 Jon McLaughlin Tickets= $54
2 Coldplay Tickets= $235.
Lots of Concert Funz=....well not priceless...actually a lot of money but thats ok.

I am now broke from the JM tickets and owe my dad a lot for the Coldplay ones.
But I still found money to spend at Old Navy to get 2 pairs of shorts and new flip flops at their big sale yesterday.

So Jon McLaughlin here in Boise on July 25th.
Shall be fun. Going with Ali and Lauren.
I hope he sings 'So Close' haha. But as long as he plays 'Human' I am good.

Coldplay in Salt Lake City on November 22nd.
Tickets went on Sale yesterday morning.
I got petty good seats. Section 6, row 3. After trying for a while. I kept getting section 1 or 2...and I wanted to be closer to the stage, so these are good. Here is a seating chart. http://media.ticketmaster.com/en-us/tmimages/venue/maps/mtn/mtn312c.gif I wanted to sit in section 8...but it wasn't giving me any there.
I AM SO EXCITED. I have wanted to see them FOREVER.

I need to talk to my brother to see if I can stay when him when we go to Coldplay...doubt he will say no.
That will be good cuz I haven't seen my nephew in over a year...

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 03:48:03 GMT

I keep forgetting I changed my password so carnivalofmecan get on to make my journal pretty. I need to change it back. Haha.

ANYWAYS

I have a Medieval Europe History Mid Term tomorrow.
Preeettyyy sure I am going to fail. Been studying for the past 3 hours and I am no where near done. I am going to go read the book the essay is on...or well skim it. We can use it tomorrow so hopefuly I will find what I need.
I should have started studying yesterday...instead of watching Day After Tomorrow and Camp Rock on TV. (Dont ask me about the last one...I dont even know how I started watching that.)
FUUUCCCKKKK.

Stupid upper devison summer classes.

So I went camping this weekend at the lake. And I lost my glasses because I am an idiot. They are now at the bottom of Lucky Peak. Yay go me.

I got new ones yesterday. They are Versace....and NO that has NOTHING to do with Paddy...

Ok I better stop procrastinating and go read till Midnight and then go to sleep and then get up at 7, go on a coffe run and then study till 9am.

A little about me

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 06:12:11 GMT

I am going to do 2 memes I stole from pennilesspoet17 because I feel like it. And also because I just spent like 2 hours doing math homework...and enjoying it. Yes I am a freak.

Please copy mine below, erase my answers putting yours in their place then post it in your journal! Please elaborate on the questions that would benefit from elaboration! One-Word-Answers seldom help anyone out :)

1. First Name: Kristina

2. Age:20. Next bday is going to be AWESOME. We are going to try and go to Seattle, my bday is the Friday of a long weekend, because it will be more fun than Bozeman. AND I WANT TO RIDE THE FREAKIN FERRY.

3. Location: Well at the moment I am in Meridian Idaho. This is "home." But it will be the last time (hopefully) that I live here for more than 2 or so weeks. I spend 9 months of the year in Bozeman Montana where I go to college. I FREAKIN LOVE IT. It now feels more like home than here. I do hate that it snows for about 7+ of the months I am up there haha.

4. Occupation: Well a student mostly. I am majoring in Film. And that takes up so much of my time. I try and hold a part time job during the school year but it is hard. Right now I am taking summer classes, so I am still a student.

But I am also an intern at a production company. Which we like to joke about...today I did internly things for like the first time. I booked a plane ticket and jokingly took some papers across the hall for my supervisor. I mostly hang out and work with Steve, one of the creative producers/directors. Right now we are working on a PSA.

I also work for Community Partnerships of Idaho. I work with disabled young adults and adults and teach them life skills and take them out into the community. It's a lot of work but I love it. I have been doing it whenever I am home since last summer. This year I am going to miss camp and I am so freakin sad about that. Its like the best week ever. (The easiest way, but prob not the best, to describe it is 'The Ringer' but at camp.)

5. Partner?: Don't have one. Never have. I am always just considered one of the guys. It's kind of starting to suck. But oh well...I don't plan on getting married for a while anyways. It's weird so many of my friends are already married...I find them crazy.

6. Kids: I love kids. I was so set against having them until about 2 years ago. Now I want to have them some day. I already have names picked out.

7. Brothers/Sisters: Well this is a loaded question. Technically I have 1 brother and 1 half brother. But my brother is 3 years older than me and I HATE HIM WITH A PASSION. And I really mean that. Its a long story that includes drugs, screwing up my family, and his life and him being the biggest asshole on the planet. I like to pretend he doesn't exist.

My half brother is from my mom's first marriage. He is umm 36...37...38? I think the same age as Ewan actually haha. And I don't see him a whole lot. He lives in Utah, and he is a total geek haha. He is married and they adopted a little boy a couple years ago. I think he is 3 or 4. And is SO FREAKIN ADORABLE. He is half African American and omg so cute. My parents see them a lot but I am always at school. I am hoping to see them this summer...if not I will prob stay with them (still need to ask) when I go see Coldplay in Nov.

Now to the even more complicated part. I was adopted when I was born. And my real mom contacted me for the first time last year. (yeah I wont get into that but it includes myspace haha) and I guess I have 2 younger biological brothers (one is umm 15 or something and the other is like 9) and I think she just had a baby girl this past year. I am not in contact with her (not ready) but yeah...it's crazy to think that I have this other family somewhere.

8. Pets: None anymore. I had a dog, Kit, by my parents had to put him down this last year, he was only 5 years old. Sadness.

9. List the 3-5 biggest things going on in your life: Summer classes. Medieval Europe History, Intro to Math Thought, and US History later this summer. Internship. Love it. Work. Love it most of the time. Fanfiction. What I do when I should be doing homework...or paying attention in class...or during any free time actually. Grey's. The love of my life...and what fanfic I am normally reading haha. It needs to come back like now.

10. School: I LOVED High school. Or well the last 2 years of it. I was so freakin involved. Broadcasting, Girls Varsity Lacrosse Captain, Basketball Manager, Student Council, and then all the social aspects. I lived at the school and I loved it. I was closer to my principal and some of my teachers than I prob am with my own parents.

Now I attend Montana State University in Bozeman. I am majoring in film and its crazy and amazing and pretty much my life. Also I am minoring in History. I have made some awesome friends, and changed a lot over the past 2 years. I am more me now than I ever have been.

At the moment I am taking Summer classes at Boise State University. It's a great school but I miss MSU.

11. Parents: My mom is Ember. We dont get a long and I have never felt closer to her. I think one of those reasons is that she ALWAYS sides with my brother no matter what, even though he does not deserve it. She drives me insane and I can't really stand being around her for very long. She is kind of crazy...seriously.

I have always been a daddy's girl. His name is Roy and he is always there for me. When I was younger he was always involved in my sports. He took classes to be my softball teams umpire, he drove me allll the way out to the ice hockey rink for practice and games, even when they were at 5:45 in the morning, and he never missed a lacrosse game unless he HAD to. Now he will give me money when he knows I need it and he has put up with my crazy film dreams and supported me 110%. He makes me laugh a lot, and we always watched movies and tv together. He let me convert him to a Grey's fan and puts up with my ranting.

But he still drives me crazy a lot of the time. My parents are just so conservative and the complete opposite of me.

My real mom contacted me last year on myspace. It really is her. She wants to know me, but wont push. I am so not ready for that. I don't hate her and I have never been angry with her, but it's just weird. She has a whole different family now and I know she wanted what was best for me (she was 18 and still in HS) but sometimes I wonder if I wasn't good enough for her or something...I dunno...I try not to think about it.

12. Who are some of your closest friends?: Well I have 4 best friends from High School. Danielle I have known since I was like 2 and we fight like sisters. I love her to death and she will always be my best friend. She just got married in March and it is crazy. But I love her husband as well and they are perfect for each other. We can fight or not see each other for months but when get together its like nothing has happened and time hasn't passed. Lauren, Ali and Elaina I have known for most of HS. I wonder why I am still friends with them after they kind of ditched me a lot Junior year. But they got smart and realized how awesome I am and senior year we were ALWAYS together. We have drifted apart over the past 2 years, and they are not really happy with a lot of the decisions I have made lately but they are still my friends and they always will be.

My Bozeman friend are the best. Especially my film friends. I have my "crew" who I am pretty much always with. Luke(who is my best friend), Ian (and his GF Mina), Kyler (who is leaving, sad!), Wyatt (who is 32 and married and like my older brother and I love him to death), Jordan (who is 25 and also married and the crazy one), and then Melinda(who I didn't like at first because I was used to being the only girl with my guys, but now I am really close with her and she saves me from the madness that can be the boys). I spend most of my time with them. We are known as a group. There are also some other people who are in our group sometimes. Brian, Alyse and JR. And also Ryan, who I spend a lot of time with because he also lives in Boise.

I have a few non film friends but we don't hang out as much as we used to.

Then their are my online friends. I love them because I don't have to try and be someone different when we talk. I am just me. You Guys are awesome.

Miriam, carnivalofme gets her own paragraph. Shit, she is like my second half. She is my person. It's crazy. We finish each other's sentences, think the same thing at the same time and know how to cheer each other up. If I dont talk to her for a couple days, I feel lost. (LIKE RIGHT NOW, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!!!) We have so many random inside jokes that if other people heard, they would commit us. I love her so freakin much and I have never met her. We have really only known each other for less than a year. But life would suck without her. I cannot wait till one of us can travel to where the other lives. (I would so come but plane tickets to Germany are wayyyy expensive.) And we are going to live together in LA. The world better watch out because once we are in the same place...its going to be LEGEN-wait for it-DARY.

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Ok BED FREAKIN TIME. Well after I read my fanfic updates. hehe.

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 23:18:08 GMT

Happy Johnny Depp Day!

Sun, 08 Jun 2008 22:57:16 GMT

So I went and saw The Strangers last night with Danielle, Mike and Danielle's younger brother Skylar.

It was good for a scary movie. I usually hate them cuz they are so lame and don't even scare me because they are so predictable. This one had me on the edge of my seat.

The film making was good. Some REALLY awesome reveals of the scary people.

But I couldn't help but keep wondering who the lead guy was.

I was like HE LOOKS SO FAMILIAR! Who is it?

Then I was like OOOOO! IT'S SCOTT SPEEDMAN. He is pretteh. I used to have a little crush on him after I saw him in something. (No not Felicity.)

He looks like Paddy sometimes...yummy.

So my schedule starts to SUCK tomorrow.

Have to leave the house by 9am.
Classes from 9:40am to 1:30pm. (History and Math)
On MWF I have my internship at a production company from 2-5pm.
On TTH I have work from 2-5:30ish.

Ew. My summer isn't going to be reallly fun. But at least I have evenings and weekends off.

BUT I WONT GET TO TALK TO carnivalofme MUCH ANYMORE. SADDNESS. Miriam you have permission to spam this entry whenever you want.

Tue, 03 Jun 2008 06:28:48 GMT

OMG.
This makes me realllllly realllly happy.
Ewan is going to be in Angels and Demons.
It's one of my all time favorite books.
I read about this a while ago but I didn't know it was official.
The movie will still prob suck. Ron Howard KILLLLLED The Da Vinci Code.
But yay Ewan!

Also HOLY SHIT. I watched Game 5 of the Stanley Cup playoffs. Now if Pittsburgh won there would be another game, but if Detroit won it was all over. When I turned on the TV to watch the last period, The Penguins were up by 1. But The Red Wings DOMINATED that period. Bringing the score up 3-2. I thought it was over, until Pittsburgh scored with less than 30 seconds left.

THE GAME WENT INTO TRIPLE OVERTIME. Which is amazing because each OT period is sudden death. The Pens goalie, Marc-Andre Fleury, SAVED THEM. He is a god.

Anyways the Penguins won, and that is who I was cheering for, so Game 6 is on Wednesday night. I am so watching. It made me remember why Hockey is the best sport on the planet. And it also made me miss playing it sooo much.

Storm

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 21:48:59 GMT

New favorite song.
I was listening to this CD on the drive home from school, skipping most songs, then the last one came on and I had an OMG moment.
Then I proceeded to listen to it many many times.

Storm-Lifehouse
http://youtube.com/watch?v=6o-OJWINPpE

How long have I been in this storm?
So overwhelmed by the ocean’s shapeless form
Water's getting harder to tread
With these waves crashing over my head

If I could just see you
Everything would be all right
If I'd see you
This darkness would turn to light

And I will walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
I know everything will be all right
I know everything i'ts right

I know you didn’t bring me out here to drown
So why am I ten feet under and upside down
Barely surviving has become my purpose
Because I’m so used to living underneath the surface

If I could just see you
Everything would be all right
If I'd see you
This darkness would turn to light

And I will walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
I know will be all right

And I would walk on water
And you will catch me if I fall
And I will get lost into your eyes
I know everything will be alright
I know everything is alright

It's my new MerDer song.

In other going ons, I spent this last weekend making a movie with Ryan for the 48 hour film fest. After it shows next week I will put it online. I didn't get much sleep but I had TONS of fun.

I start summer classes next week. Not fun. But I have my internship meeting on Wednesday, that should be fun.

RIP Sydney.

Tue, 27 May 2008 06:43:01 GMT

What is with the 2nd group of my favorite actors dying?
First Anthony Minghella and now Sydney Pollack.

I love all the stuff of his I have seen and he has always been on my list, even it was after the top 5.
He still made my top 10.

My two favorites of his are The Interpreter and Out of Africa.

But I also loved a lot of movies he produced or acted in. For example he did both in Michael Clayton.
And he worked with Anthony Minghella a lot as well, like on Breaking and Entering, Cold Mountain and The Talented Mr. Ripley.

The one role I will always remember him, and how most of my flist prob knows him, is his last one. As Paddy's dad, Thomas Bailey Sr., in Made of Honor. I'm sorry, I LOVE that movie but kind of not the best last role. Won't be getting any awards for that one.

He was an amazing actor and director and will be missed.

New amazing layout

Sun, 25 May 2008 06:13:56 GMT

NEW AMAZING LAYOUT. ewanroxmysox ewanroxmysox

Made by carnivalofme like always. *squishes*
Took her 3 hours to get something I finally liked.
She wanted to kill me..

BUT HELLO MOST PIVOTAL POINT IN GREY'S HISTORY.
Kind of had to be perfect.
Mer still looks kind of funky BUT there were NO good caps.

Also got a few new icons. Trust me, there will be more.

We are also making TEAM MerDer shirts.
Cuz wow we have went through a looottttt of shit with this ship since the beginning.
But we stood strong. Or at least I know I did.

They will be sweeet.

On the front they are going to say:
We Stayed.
We Didn't Move.
We Waited.

And on the back they will say:
Team MerDer.
ordinary apart. extraordinary together.

Once we get the design down they will be available at cafepress.
Yes I know. Miriam and I are awesome.

*goes to watch final 3min for the 100th time*

Fri, 23 May 2008 04:27:18 GMT

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I
HAVE
NO
WORDS

GREY'S
FUCKING
ROCKS

IT'S
BACK
AND
O
M
G
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PERFECT AND AHHHHHHHHHH.

I DIDN'T THINK THEY COULD DO IT BUT AHHHHH.

I was almost in tears of joy and ahhh.

Ahhhh. I need to see that again.

Wyatt and Jordan BOTH texted me a picture of the BEST THING EVER cuz they know I would be freaking out and I guess they were watching with their wives and thought of me freaking out. Thought I have no idea how cuz I was to busy freaking out during that scene to even THINK about anything.
But it made me LOL and it's why I love them.

EDIT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BD9YN4XxHNY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. BEST. MOMENT. OF. MY. LIFE.

No More For You

Thu, 22 May 2008 08:46:56 GMT

Dear Mr. Lucas,

Please for the love of god, STOP MAKING MOVIES.

And ruining your already good trilogies. (Though I did kind of like the 3rd SW)

Also stop making Speilberg look bad. (He does that sometimes on his own)

Thank you
-Kristina.

Just got back from Indy 4.

AND OH DEAR GOD. SOOOOOO BAD.

We had a whole row + more of film students.

Wyatt and I spent most of the movie laughing at how bad it was.
Not just story/dialog, though that was most of it. Even the film making was bad on many levels.
So many non motivated shots. And Ugh. I kept thinking that my directing professor would be cringing.

We think Spielberg slept in a lot and decided to let Lucas fill in those days.
But not all the time, because some times there was good acting. He showed up those days.

There was one line, can't remember which one, that you KNEW Ford did NOT want to say. We were laughing lots at that.

We also thought they were going to start handing out medals at the end, and that Chewy would show up.

I have decided that this movie never happened. I love the originals too much. Only 3 Indy movies for me.

I still find it odd that Lucas and Spielberg can work together/be friends. Because Lucas is one of the innovators of digital film making and is hard core into it. While Spielberg will use till his dying day 35MM and linear editing. He is hard core old school. One of the few left. I mean seriously he owns pretty much ALL the linear editing systems still around. I don't get how they can work together. They are extreme polar opposites in the biggest, dirtiest debate in film.

Oh wellz. It wont matter because Lucas is not allowed to make movies anymore.

Wed, 21 May 2008 10:34:54 GMT

I just sat down and watched the whole first season of How I Met Your Mother.

It's all carnivalofme's fault. She made me do it.

I oddly ship both Ted/Robin and Barney/Robin.

The last being Miriam's fault on some levels. But during 1.14 they played awesome laser tag and Barney made excellent points and they were full of awesome. And I dunno...they would work. But for now I love Ted/Robin because they are complicated and I tend to love the complicated. (See my MerDer love)

I am so very sad about Marshall/Lily and I hope that gets fixed. I adore Jason Segal and I was excited when I found out he was in the show. And Lily makes me giggle.

I have to say, Barney is one of the coolest people ever.

Ok it's after 4:30am and I need to read the Dusk and Summer update and then sleep.
So I can start on Season 2 later today and hopefully clean my apartment.

The Final Death of McDreamy.

Fri, 16 May 2008 03:25:07 GMT

Oh Derek. You were starting to win me back over. But now you will NEVER be "McDreamy" EVER again.

And I seriously don't think he deserves Mer...at all.

Cuz she is awesome. And taking responsibility. He is not. He is taking the easy way out.

He would have won his way back but he didn't break up with Plant tonight like he should have.

I don't see how what they say is going to happen next episode happens.

Thu, 01 May 2008 20:12:15 GMT

IT'S GREY'S DAY!

YAY!

And I had my last class today.
Still have 1 huge project and 2 finals but I will be all done by Tuesday.

Made of Honor comes out tomorrow. YAY FOR HOT PADDY.
All the press makes me happy because we get a lot of Patrick.
And damn he is fiiiinneee.

Um NEW PROFILE. Go read it.
It's pretteh.

And that is all.

HAI THAR!

Sat, 26 Apr 2008 18:58:29 GMT

This is carnivalofme reporting for duty... which is wreaking havoc on Kristina's journal while she's asleep. No, I've been good. Seriously! Check out the new layout featuring Klexie (that is Klepto + Lexie okay. Spread the word.), now with bigger font and customized comment page. Kristina hasn't seen it yet but she better fucking like it or I'll replace it with this. Oh yes I would. And she'd be helpless because Kristina and html don't go well together. Har har.

(Dude. I can't believe I wasted 3 minutes of my life photoshopping that.)

Also? Shiny new icon! *points* Yes, I found out how to make cool animated text icons with ImageReady. Because Kristina said she wanted one with that quote, and if I hadn't done it she probably would have rented a truck so she could hit me (srsly she's scaree) or I don't know, TAKEN MY TOYS AWAY. ~~*clings to everything Barney/Robin*~~

I might have made other select, subtle changes, but I can't tell you because Kristina needs to find them on her own. *whistles*

SO IN CONCLUSION, I HAVE BEEN A BUSY BEE. ~~WORSHIP ME.~~

And now she needs to get up so we can re-watch the awesomeness that was Thursday night's episode of Grey's, woot!

/end hijack.

IT'S BACK

Fri, 25 Apr 2008 07:24:34 GMT

I know I haven't updated in ages.

I have been crazy busy.

But I just have to say

GREY'S ANATOMY IS FUCKING BACK.

God I missed my show. Tonight was the best episode in the past year. Since before the Ferry Arc.

And Lexie is like by far my favorite character (See icon). And Markie.

God.

As I have been saying the past hour with carnivalofme OMDF. (Oh My Dempsey Fuck) and OMFPD (Oh My Fucking Patrick Dempsey)

Next week is going to kick ass.

Addie is back and she is piiiisssed

Update. Update.

Tue, 26 Feb 2008 05:59:11 GMT

So I am on set right now. But I am a Gaffer and mostly running the light board and they are shooting right now so they don't need me. I SHOULD be doing homework since I have a lot of it and not a lot of time the next couple weeks to do it but meh who wants to do homework.

Anyways lots has gone on. Firstly
THE OSCARS.
I watched them at Wyatt's house with him, Jordan, Cheeree(Jordan's wife), and Melinda. Faye(Wyatt's wife) showed up for the last bit as well.
I DROVE THEM ALL CRAZY with my Paddy fangirling. I could spot him a mile away when he was in the crowd, Jill was wearing a bright dress, and I would always be like OOO IT'S PATRICK. And then when he came on, I wasn't paying much attention because it was right after a commercial and I was talking to Wyatt and Jordan and I turned RIGHT before he started talking and saw it was him and was like in a really high voice "OMG IT'S PATRICK DEMPSEY!! PAADDDYYYY!!" Yes...they all wanted to kill me by the end of the night.

I lost the Oscar poll and had to get up in lecture today and say "I am a big fat loser."

OMG WYATT HAS THE CUTEST DOG EVER. I love him. His name is Bernard and omg I just want to squish him.

2ndly.
It was my birthday on the 13th. Jordan, Kyler, Melinda, Lara, Morgan, Alex, Ian, Mina, Luke, J.R., Wyatt and I all went out for dinner. It was great fun.

Ooo BRB I have to go reprogram the light board while everyone breaks for late dinner.

Morgan made these Mini-Cupcakes for me. I ate RISTIN all in one sitting.

Luke and J.R. at dinner.

Wyatt and Jordan drinking down at the end of the table.

Ian and Mina in deep conversation...the looooooove eachother. Hahaha random.

Melinda, Me and my huge mouth, and Lara.

The whole group from one table. Left side: Jordan, Kyler, Melinda, Me, Lara, Morgan, Alex. Left Side: Wyatt, J.R. Luke, Mina, Ian.

The group from the other side. Right: Ian, Mina, Luke, J.R. Wyatt. Left: Alex, Morgan, Lara, Me, Melinda, Kyler, Jordan.

They started singing happy birthday. It was embarrassing.

Then they started clapping. Which made it worse.

It was all rather funny.

Melinda and I. She is the one who saves me from the madness which is the guys.

Wyatt and I. He is like my favorite. He is like my older brother.

Luke and I looking spaztic.

J.R. has this weird obsession with fake Js. Lol.

Aww they love eachother and I love them.

Anyways....yeah. The next couple of weeks will be crazy. Working on another film next week. Have 2 mid terms this week. My directing scene is due. Proposal due in Writing. And I am trying to get a job. I have an interview on Wednesday.

And now I am going to go help them set up...because I am want to get this done so we can get out of here on time at 2am.

Rock On

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 10:42:32 GMT

I played Rock Band for 6 hours tonight.

That thing is addicting. Good thing no one I know at school has it. Or NOTHING would get done.
I might just spend my weekend at home playing that.
I rock at the Bass...suck at the drums because I have NO RHYTHM.
I wonder if my dad still has that XBox 360...

Sleep time.

Run Away

Mon, 11 Feb 2008 02:54:49 GMT

We say good-bye, I turn my back
Run away, run away
So predictable
Not far from here, you see me crack
Like a bone, like a bone
I'm so breakable

And I take everything from you
But you'll take anything
Won't you?

Run away, run away, like a prodigal
Don't you wait for me, don't you wait for me
So ashamed, so ashamed
But I need you so
And you wait for me, and you wait for me

I'm on the road, to who knows where?
Look ahead, not behind
I keep saying, there's no place to go
Where you're not there
On your rope, I hold tight
But it's fraying

And I take everything from you
But you'll take anything
Won't you?

Run away, run away, like a prodigal
Don't you wait for me, don't you wait for me
So ashamed, so ashamed
But I need you so
And you wait for me, and you wait for me

Everybody wants to be right
But only if it's not in day light?
I keep trying to find my way back
My way back

Run away, run away, like a prodigal
Don't you wait for me, don't you wait for me
So ashamed, so ashamed
But I need you so
And you wait for me, and you wait for me

Runaway, runaway, runaway
From you, from you, from you

That is one of my all time favorite songs. And has been my MerDer theme song since I first heard it. It just randomly poped up on my iTunes and I had to post it. Even though it HURTS.

Also IF YOU HAVE FACEBOOK JOIN THIS GROUP THAT carnivalofme AND I CREATED.

Don't you love my random MerDer song findings.

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 06:52:23 GMT

I'm strong
But I break
I'm stubborn
And I make plenty of mistakes
Yeah I'm hard
And life with me is never easy
To figure out, to love
I'm jaded but oh so lovely
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe

Someday
When we're at the same place
When we're on the same road
When it's okay to hold my hand
Without feeling lost
Without all the excuses
When it's just because you love me, you let me, you need me
Then maybe, maybe
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe

I'm confusing as hell
I'm north and south
And I'll probably never have it all figured out
But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you
And I promise I'll try
Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me
Every single detail you missed with your eyes
Then maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe

One day
We'll meet again and you'll need me, you'll see me completely
Every little bit
Oh yeah maybe you'll love me, you'll love me then

I don't want to be tough
And I don't want to be proud
I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found
I'm not lost
I need to be loved
I just need to be loved
I just want to be loved by you and I won't stop 'cause I believe
That maybe, yeah maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe

I should know better than to touch the fire twice
But I'm thinking maybe, yeah maybe you might

Maybe, love maybe.

Thu, 31 Jan 2008 05:17:10 GMT

Just got back from seeing the Blue Man Group.
It was really cool.
I didn't really want to go in the first place but my friends got me a ticket and it was worth it.
They put on a really good show, kind of cheesy, but really funny.
i have some videos on my phone..if they are any good I might upload them.

My friend and I were arguing about their blue faces, wondering if it was paint or not. *goes to wikipedia* Hmmm paint and latex. Interesting.

Has anyone read or seen 'Waiting for Godot" by Samuel Beckett?
I am doing a scene out of it for my directing class, and my professor thinks I am a bit crazy cuz I guess it's one of the most difficult plays of all time to direct.
But when I first read it I thought of it as a slap stick comedy, more than a meaningful play. So that is how I am doing it. Luke and JR are my actors and they make me LOL. It shall be interesting.

I was thinking about doing something by David Lindsay-Abaire because I really like his stuff that I have read/seen. We had to read "A Devil Inside" last year and also see "Kimberly Akimbo," both were amazing. I am so excited, they are putting on a production of "Rabbit Hole", it will be awesome. My directing professor loved it and had to do it, and we are building the sets in our Production Design class.

I will stop rambling about randomness and giving you wikipeida links.
I am like DEAD TIRED. Been a busy week. I am thinking I might CRASH now.

I wish I could get MerDer out of my head...

Tue, 29 Jan 2008 05:03:21 GMT

Let it all out
Get it all out
Rip it out
Remove it
Don't be alarmed
When the wound begins to bleed

Cause we're so scared to find out
What this life's all about
So scared we're going to lose it
Not knowing all along
That's exactly what we need

And today I will trust you with confidence
Of a man who's never known defeat
But tomorrow, upon hearing what I did
I will stare at you in disbelief
Oh inconsistent me
Crying out for consistency

And you said I know that this will hurt
But if I don't break your heart
Then things will just get worse
If the burden seems too much to bear
Remember the end will justify
The pain it took to get us there

And I'll let it be known
At time I have shown
Signs of all my weakness
But somewhere in me
There is strength

And you promise me
That you believe
In time I will defeat this
Cause somewhere in me
There is strength

And today I will trust you with the confidence
Of a man who's never known defeat
And I'll try my best to just forget
That that man isn't me

And you said I know that this will hurt
But if I don't break your heart
Then things will just get worse
If the burden seems too much to bear
Remember the end will justify
The pain it took to get us there

And you said I know that this will hurt
But if I don't break your heart
Then things will just get worse
If the burden seems too much to bear
Remember the end will justify
The pain it took to get us there

Reach out to me
Make my heart brand new
Every beat will be for you
For you

And I know you know
You touched my life
When you touched my heavy heart
And made it light

Heart ache made you who you are.

Sun, 27 Jan 2008 04:52:47 GMT

I just saw a Derek/Plant kiss icon and I think I threw up a little in my mouth.
Ugh.

So one of my bestest friends, Lara, has been in LA since Wednesday and I gave her a mission. And that of course is Paddy stalking, but I forgot HE IS IN FLORDIA FOR A RACE. Blah...now I wont get a phone call from him. Unless he gets back before she leaves next week. It's very sad. I just wanted to discuss the downfall of Derek with him.

I watched the first 2 eps of Season 3 today with my roommate and *sigh* I MISS THAT SHOW. Fuck, it was amazing. (And my iTunes wants to mock me by playing music from it. MEAN.) I miss DEREK more than anything though. He was just such an interesting character; now he is just stupid and not even the same guy.

And now I am watching the first episode of Season 1 with Melinda. HA. I take another person's Grey's Virginity. I am such a Grey's whore.

Wedding.

Thu, 24 Jan 2008 07:11:18 GMT

I don't know if I have said this, but I have known since October, my best friend is getting married in March.
I am a bridesmaid. ugh. I have to wear a dress,which is fine, it's the freakin 3 1/2in heels that is going to kill me. I trip in Converse.

Anyways that's not the point. ("THE POINT IS WHO ARE YOU? WHO ARE YOU?!?" Haha sorry I love that movie)

For her wedding present I want to make a video with pictures and video of Her and Mike. From when they were kids, to when they met and started dating, to him asking (which is on video), engagement pics, up to the wedding and the wedding. So ha I will be working on it until the final min...and I sill prob wont finish it till after the wedding.

And I want to show it at the reception when I give it to them.

I am going to call her mom tomorrow so I can start getting pics and they can sift through their home movies, and also to have her ask Mike's parents.

So I need music. Here is the list I have so far. It's mostly my music. They like everything, but especially country and well anything on the radio haha. Most of it's mine. Since it just out of the 310 songs I have on my iTunes (Yes I still need to add my other 5,000+ songs from when it crashed)

The first song is their song so yeah. The ( ) means the part I am thinking about putting it in if I have an idea.

Here by Rascal Flatts (Dating)
Come What May by Ewan McGregor and Nicole Kidman (Wedding)
This Time by Jonathan Rhys Meyers (Mike)
She's Everything by Brad Paisley(Dani)
Oh Love by Brad Paisley, Carrie Underwood
All We Are by OneRepublic (Date)
That's How You Know by Amy Adams (This is kind of an inside joke, I pro would just use the first bit)
So Close by John McLaughlin (Wedding)
Somebody Like You by Keith Urban (Date)
Making Memories of Us by Keith Urban (Date)
All I Need by Mat Kearney
10,000 Angels by Caedmon's Call
I Will Show You Love by Kendall Payne (Family)
This Year's Love by David Gray
Wedding Dress by Matt Nathanson (Wedding)
Signal Fire by Snow Patrol (Asking)

Any other ideas?